Criticism can be not only useful but also destructive, and it is important to respond to it correctly. An effective work process is impossible without criticism. However, it is not always pleasant to hear, especially when remarks are made in a raised tone. How to respond to your boss's comments is explained by Margarita Byelina, a communications expert.
How to Respond to Unconstructive Criticism
Professional criticism points out the mistakes and shortcomings of an employee. Ideally, it should be substantiated, contain evidence of guilt, and provide practical recommendations on how to rectify the situation. A reasonable manager understands that any job can have flaws. If your competencies satisfy them, it remains to fine-tune the nuances.
However, criticism is not always constructive, even from management. Emotional remarks directed at you that affect your self-esteem may stem from the boss's personal problems, character traits, and cultural level. It is difficult to draw conclusions from them, as the judgments are contradictory and often contain nitpicking about appearance, temperament, or voice—things that are not directly related to competencies.
How should you respond in such cases? Under no circumstances should you respond emotionally, engage in conflict, or try to prove anything. Remain unflappable. If you have indeed made a mistake, acknowledge your fault. You can say that you will take the comments into account and adjust your actions. This reaction is possible if you have previously performed your duties excellently, and the mistake is merely an accident.
When you do not know how to solve a task, say so. Perhaps a more experienced colleague will be assigned to assist you, materials will be provided, or the problem will be redirected to another employee.
Establishing Boundaries and Maintaining Subordination
To avoid destructive criticism in the workplace, it is essential to build proper relationships with colleagues and management. Remember that the boss is not your friend, and among employees, there are envious individuals and competitors.
Do not make personal remarks in conversations, do not discuss your family, friends, health problems, and especially do not gossip. Talk only about work-related topics in a calm tone. If a colleague makes a mistake that relates to your duties, point it out, supporting your speech with numbers and facts.
When establishing boundaries with employees and management, take a neutral position and do not express strong emotions. Judge those around you solely by their competencies. This way, you will always have an argument against destructive criticism: "I never allow myself such remarks towards you, so I ask you to speak with restraint and to the point." This reaction effectively "puts the critic in their place" and redirects the conversation in the right direction.
If you have people under your supervision, evaluate only their professional qualities and results, being as specific as possible. Such behavior will earn you respect and make it clear to higher-ups that you do not accept destructive criticism.
What to Say to a Toxic Boss to Keep Your Job
If you have made a mistake only once and your boss had a difficult day, do not pay attention to the manager's emotions; acknowledge the mistake and start correcting the situation.
However, sometimes you find yourself under a person who likes to assert themselves at the expense of subordinates, is not averse to inserting strong words, or makes overly emotional remarks. How should you react if you have to listen to criticism over trivial matters almost daily?
Do not show that you are hurt, outraged, or worried. Wait for the end of the sentence and ask what exactly the mistake is. If the boss says, "You are negligent in your duties!", calmly ask, "How does this manifest?".
When the conversation turns personal, clarify how it directly relates to work. When the boss criticizes your manner of speaking or nitpicks about how documents are laid out on the table, ask if they have any complaints about the results you are delivering. Persistently steer the conversation back to business until the boss specifies which of your professional qualities they are dissatisfied with.
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