“I was used, and it hurts a lot”: Alexandra Kurusova's relationship has ended 0 15

Kurusova admits that by nature she is overly trusting and full of hope, but even her patience has come to an end. "I just realized that I was used — now I see it from the outside, that I was used. This is, of course, very painful," Alexandra shares about the bitter realization.

Although she was blamed for what happened during the breakup, Alexandra believes that the responsibility for the breakdown of the relationship lies with both partners. She does not hide the fact that sometimes she behaved provocatively solely out of pain: "I fully understand — if I did some silly things, that was my reaction. I wanted to take it out, so that it wouldn’t be just me suffering — not only was I crying at home every evening, not only was I going through it and really couldn’t find my place, but I also wanted the person to feel that it was a bit unfair."

Mainots added in the conversation that, in his opinion, the mistakes made were a result of an emotional outburst that overshadowed the fact that there was a lack of respect in the relationship. Although Alexandra avoids directly comparing this love to previous ones, she admits that her heart is broken now. Nevertheless, looking back, she cherishes the beautiful moments: "The moments that were — those good moments... I wish everyone to experience something similar — to feel those emotions and that love."

Despite what has happened, the professional environment demands constant optimism and energy from Alexandra. "My heart is just bleeding, really bleeding, but at the same time, you have to pull yourself together," the coach admits with tears in her eyes. She is tired of having to publicly pretend that everything is fine: "When everything is just in a mess for you — and you always have to hold it together. I’m tired of this pretense."

Now, after making the decision, she begins to feel the first relief. The fears of what others will think have weakened, and the desire to communicate with those around her without masks is returning. "I really feel like I’m coming back to life. I’m starting to live again," Kurusova says.

Although the opposite sex shows interest, Alexandra is in no hurry to jump into a new adventure. She wants time for herself to fully heal her wounds, rather than seeking comfort in others. Her goal is self-sufficiency, she confidently emphasizes: "I don’t need a band-aid right now. Let everything calm down, settle down, let me get myself back. I will prove to everyone that life after 40 is just beginning."